The following is Part One of a transcript collected from a commencement speech delivered at Newfound Regional in June of 2024; Bristol, New Hampshire.
“It’s time to move on to the next chapter of your life. This will be an exciting one. I believe that you’re ready. I have great optimism in that. Optimism is a word I use a lot.
I wouldn’t always have said that. I grew up in the city of Chicago, not a bad neighborhood, but we had to stay pretty close to the house when we played. I wasn’t as active as I should have been in those early days.
I mention that because my story really begins when I started playing football. My whole family played football, I wanted so badly to be part of that tradition, and until then my experience was mostly on concrete with a nerf ball.
But when we moved from the city to the suburbs, I signed up for the real thing, and I remember that first day of practice vividly.
So I’m out there on the field, thrilled to be there. The new kid in town, excited not only by the sport, but all these new potential friends.
To begin practice, the coaches sent us on a warmup lap around the backstop of a nearby baseball field. I start jogging along, feeling pretty excited about things, and then something happened.
My legs began to burn, my lungs were on fire, I couldn’t catch my breath. I was so out of shape that this warmup lap pretty quickly turned into a casual torture.
By the time we all rounded the backstop, I had slowed to a walk, I couldn’t breathe.
So there I am, the chubby little new kid, in a sort of physical pain that I had not previously experienced, watching this wave of potential friends recede before me.
Not long after, I experienced loss in the family, I was having trouble finding my way in a new town, I was lonely, acting out, and eventually, after a lunchroom prank involving skunk spray, got suspended from school.
I felt like a square peg that kept trying to fit into round holes. And I couldn’t get it right.
I had a lot of support along the way, most notably a loving family, but there were hard times. Hard times, but important times in my development. I maintained optimism, I learned work ethic, I did push ups at home, I tried hard at practice, and by the end of that season, I received the ‘Most Improved’ award at our team banquet.
That might be the most important recognition I’ve ever received.
It taught me that situations are not permanent, and that we have some agency in them. We can change things for the better, if we decide, commit, and keep a positive outlook.
From then on, I was determined to write my own script. As you all move forward, let me be the first to remind you that there is no script for life. You write it yourself. Self-authorship is what it’s all about.
You are officially embarking on a journey where you are both the main character and the primary author. That’s good news. You get to decide, within certain parameters, how the story will unfold.
It will be both fun and challenging – mostly because, when you are writing your own story, the next page is always blank.
I’ve been confronted with the blank page routinely throughout my life. When I was your age I didn’t know what to major in in college, so I bounced around and eventually picked Studio Art, and minored in Sports Administration, hedging my studies across my interests while I played football and had some fun, just trying to find my way.
After college, I still didn’t know what to do but I knew I loved football. So I sat at my desk one day, staring at a literal blank page, and started making a list of some of the places I’d like to visit. I did some research on countries that had American Football, made some phone calls, and eventually booked a one way ticket to Limerick, Ireland.
I did not know who would be picking me up from the airport, I did not know where I would sleep that night, but I knew an adventure was awaiting me on the other side.
I remember my first practice that season as well. Significantly different. This time I was prepared, physically at least. Groggy from jetlag, a bit sore, caked in mud from a rain soaked field, and I remember looking around and feeling fully, deeply, happy.
Parents, don’t worry, I’m not suggesting that any of your kids take off to another country after the ceremony.
I am suggesting that we all go forward, ready to write our own unique story, while being thoughtful, not fearful.
To that end, I will share a few easy lessons I needed at your age: (lessons to follow in future posts – until then, check out the full video!)
