By Mike Clayton, USA Wrestling
In today’s fast-paced world, we’re constantly bombarded with messages about instant gratification and overnight success. We see perfectly curated social media feeds for our heroes in sports, entertainment, and business and it can be easy to feel envy for the achievements of others as we yearn to replicate their journeys – but in a compressed timeline.
The truth is, true excellence, be it in our careers, health, or personal growth, doesn’t happen overnight.
Rushing Success: A Recipe for Burnout
Imagine trying to learn an entire language in a week. You can take intensive courses that help memorize many basic phrases, but fluency (excellence) requires consistent practice and immersion. Consistency and immersion are needed to pick up the subtleties of language, including tone, body language, and dialogue.
For many of us, understanding others – even through our own native language – often poses challenges. What did they mean by that? How could they be so hurtful? How do they not understand this situation? Often we lack perspective because in our haste to communicate our feelings and intentions, we forget that a large part of communication and understanding relies on listening. Being patient to really listen for understanding, which is a skill that also takes time to develop and master.
The same principle applies to success in any field. While there might be lucky breaks on the climb to success, sustainable achievement comes from honing your skills, building knowledge, and weathering challenges. Rushing the process often leads to a lack of understanding and can eventually lead to burnout and frustration which creates a shaky foundation for our future goals and personal relationships.
Health: A Marathon, Not a Sprint
Our health is another area where patience is key. Building a strong, healthy body takes time and dedication. Personally, I’d never really understood anxiety. There was always an idea that mind over matter can overcome this condition, but at certain levels it, rebuilding confidence and managing anxiety can only happen over time. Broken bones take time to heal. So does our nervous system when it is damaged or broken. Give yourself and others grace and work to meet others where they are at in their journey. Don’t expect others to automatically be able to meet you where you’re at. Never assume you know the road others have had to travel just to be where they’re at right now.
Fad diets and extreme exercise routines often try to promote quick results, but they’re frequently unsustainable and can even be harmful in the long run. True well-being comes from forming healthy habits over time, like regular exercise, balanced nutrition, and adequate sleep. These habits, when practiced consistently over time, lead to a healthier and happier you.
The Magic of Time: The Ingredients of Excellence
So what key ingredients does time bring to the table when we search for excellence?
- Mastery: Repeated practice allows you to refine your skills and develop a deep understanding of your craft.
- Resilience: Facing setbacks and overcoming challenges builds mental fortitude, a crucial trait that is required when navigating the inevitable bumps on the road to success.
- Perspective: Time allows us to learn from past experiences and develop a long-term vision. We can adjust our approach and become more strategic in our pursuit of excellence as we gain perspective. We don’t always have to agree with or act based on these perspectives but understanding where they come from has tremendous power.
Shifting Our Focus: The Power of Patience
Instead of obsessing over the final destination, embrace the journey. Define what small wins look like, and be excited to learn from mistakes.
“I hope people remember me for the way I played with a smile on my face, my competitive fire. Sure, they can remember the wins but also the fun me and my teammates had together.” – Caitlin Clark
Enjoy the process of growth! Here are some tips to cultivate both fun and patience:
- Set realistic goals for the journey: Focus on achievable milestones rather than chasing unrealistic expectations. Expectations, when unmet, can be a rocky road full of emotional damage. We can drive a car fast over rough roads but without proper preparation and maintenance the car is bound to break.
- Find joy in the process: Choose activities you genuinely enjoy, making the journey itself fun and rewarding. These activities can be related to your goal or something completely different. Make time for fun each day as it will continue to fill your spirit rather than steal from it. A great quote from Jim Davis of The Good Athlete Project: “It takes more than a passion. “It takes a willingness to do the work.” That willingness is fueled by spirit and spirit requires understanding of our emotions and character. And, as we’re all learning, understanding takes time.
- Celebrate progress: Track your improvements, no matter how small, to stay motivated.
For many, we continue to learn about growth through Dr. Carol Dweck’s book “Mindset.” By fostering a growth mindset and focusing on allowing excellence to develop over time, we set ourselves up for sustainable success and for a deeper sense of accomplishment.
Focus: Know What You Want to Achieve in the End
“To begin with the end in mind means to start with a clear understanding of your destination. It means to know where you’re going so that you better understand where you are now and so that the steps you take are always in the right direction.” – Stephen R. Covey
Where do we start? Start with a deep breath. Inhale through your nose and focus on inhaling low into your belly as the breath fills higher into your abdomen and eventually into your lungs.
Then focus on exhaling. Make time for the exhale. Experience the feelings and sensations of intentional exhales that help balance levels of oxygen (brain fuel) and carbon dioxide (which helps transfer oxygen to the brain and body).
Make time for yourself. Make time for your goals. At be patient. Excellence doesn’t happen overnight.
